From child-free to freaking out

First trimester pregnancy is the worst fart joke EVER

May 21, 2018

First trimester pregnancy is the worst fart joke EVER

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It’s only been five weeks and the farting during pregnancy is out of control. It’s both humiliating and scary at times. And SO SMELLY! Omg, so smelly.

I silently farted in the car with my husband the other day — like I ALWAYS do and get away with — but this time… Oof.

Halfway through a sentence, my husband turned to me and said, “did you just fart?” I didn’t answer, just rolled down my window. And then we had to roll down ALL the windows down and drive for at least three fucking miles before the smell dissipated.

farting during pregnancy - activelytrying.com
I need this Farting unicorn onsie for MYSELF.

Then this morning I woke up with HORRIBLE stomach pains. The pain was so bad that I couldn’t even turn over in bed, let alone get up. I panicked. I despaired. Omg, is this the miscarriage I’ve been non-stop worrying about? Fuck, it’s happening. I’m losing this baby. I had finally had gotten comfortable with the fact that this chia seed might be sticking around. Oh the hubris!

I screamed through the pain as I forced myself to get up and out of bed to go to the bathroom and see how bad the bleeding was.

I sat on the toilet and waited for the worst. And then… I immediately farted. And then I farted again. And again.

And then I was fine.

farting during pregnancy - activelytrying.com
Maybe I should get this farting yoga unicorn mug to remind myself to “Relax — it’s probably just gas.”

Anyone else have such bad times farting during pregnancy that they thought they were fucking miscarrying???


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